Tis Divine, I Say Unto Thee
Glory be, My people...
Firstly, I know. I've been an irresponsible God. I've been neglecting thine blog page. Many of you have mused (believers and non) that I FINALLY have a webpage and what do I do? Abandon it like a dirty penny lost in a pile of detritus.
Take heed, righteous ones. I hath returned.
While I know I've got a plethora of e-mails and comments to respond to, I wanted to just take a moment to let you know a few things that have been resurfacing in prayers, songs, and e-mails as of late. I promise to get to the questions posed unto Me, but that shall wait.
Let us begin. So it is, so it shall be.
- Yes. Peter Jennings is up here in heaven. And yes, he was itching for a smoke. Who am I to deny him the rich, satisfying flavor he craves?
- I don't particularly like Lance Armstrong either. He does seem to be a self-righteous jerk at times, doesn't he? I thought the cancer would take care of him, but some things can't be helped.
- Sorry about all of the tropical storms and power outages. Sometimes I channel My anger through the storms and get carried away.
- I agree. Reese's Big Cups are delicious. Thank you to Mortimer in Connecticut for pointing this fact out to Me.
- Jesus has been really busy lately. He's been neglecting his prayers and spend a lot of time alone, smoking and staring wistfully into the clouds.
Saint Jim. Smug jerk.
- If I were to pick one saint that is undeserving, I would have to pick St. James. I don't know. That guy just rubs Me the wrong way.
- Moses is still embarassed about the other night. He tried to part Mother Theresa's hair (like he did the Red Sea) and made her wig fall off. In his defense, he was quite inebriated.
Or something like that.
God out.
Firstly, I know. I've been an irresponsible God. I've been neglecting thine blog page. Many of you have mused (believers and non) that I FINALLY have a webpage and what do I do? Abandon it like a dirty penny lost in a pile of detritus.
Take heed, righteous ones. I hath returned.
While I know I've got a plethora of e-mails and comments to respond to, I wanted to just take a moment to let you know a few things that have been resurfacing in prayers, songs, and e-mails as of late. I promise to get to the questions posed unto Me, but that shall wait.
Let us begin. So it is, so it shall be.
- Yes. Peter Jennings is up here in heaven. And yes, he was itching for a smoke. Who am I to deny him the rich, satisfying flavor he craves?
- I don't particularly like Lance Armstrong either. He does seem to be a self-righteous jerk at times, doesn't he? I thought the cancer would take care of him, but some things can't be helped.
- Sorry about all of the tropical storms and power outages. Sometimes I channel My anger through the storms and get carried away.
- I agree. Reese's Big Cups are delicious. Thank you to Mortimer in Connecticut for pointing this fact out to Me.
- Jesus has been really busy lately. He's been neglecting his prayers and spend a lot of time alone, smoking and staring wistfully into the clouds.
Saint Jim. Smug jerk.
- If I were to pick one saint that is undeserving, I would have to pick St. James. I don't know. That guy just rubs Me the wrong way.
- Moses is still embarassed about the other night. He tried to part Mother Theresa's hair (like he did the Red Sea) and made her wig fall off. In his defense, he was quite inebriated.
I know this doesn't even scratch the surface of some of your questions and prayers, but I shall do My best to return with new insights and holy messages to pass down unto thee. Until then...
Embrace the wind of My holy power as it comforts your heart and raises your mind up unto the skies of gold.
Or something like that.
God out.
posted by God at 11:43 AM
12 Comments:
You are alive (for the lack of a better word or understanding)! Thanks be to you.
Hello, God.. It's nice to see that I don't have to go to church to talk to you, although, I never thought that anyway.. now, you're as far away as the nearest keyboard... Justanothernickname told me that I should stop by.. check out the blog.. he doesn't seem to understand the anger I have towards you.. If you want to refresh your memory, check out my post here, http://www.peiinfo.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=2732&postdays=0&postorder=asc&start=20
it explains most, as does my blog... however, if you are as omnivourus as I was taught to believe, you won't have to look at either... have a nice day...
You seem to be using more and more thees and thines and haths and so on. It's ironic - the more you tell us not to be traditional sticks in the mud, the more you do it yourself!
Still love you, though. Keep that Moses out of trouble if you can.
I didn't belive until I read your blogg, I think you need to get flicker and get some pages of these antics going though, for all those non belivers out there, thanks for the bread and whine every sunday to, I skip breakfast and it makes up for it.
praise be to the.
You see? I shall get better about responding to comments. Thy will be done.
kikhwa - Thanks for the thanks, My child.
jack - I will help howsoever I can.
riki - I'm sorry about your loss, however I think you meant to say 'omnipotent', not omnivourus, which means I eat both plant and animal. Truth be told, I'm both. I love a good ham sandwich with a bit of lettuce.
orfeo - You noticed I've been sprucing up the language, have you? I've been accused of being 'fraudulent' and thought throwing a thee and thou might spruce it up a bit. I shalt thy word in moderation if it pleases thee. (man, I crack Myself up)
petrow - I considered a Flickr account, but I've been given the stink-eye whensoever I produce the camera. For the sake of the camera shy in heaven, I can only rely on man (and woman!) made pictures and paintings.
justanothernickname (or should I say St. Nick?)- I've seen your work firsthand and your eagerness to spread the word of this, the Holiest of Blogs. Keep it up and sainthood is yours for the taking.
I've got a few minutes. I think I shalt nip over to your blog.
1) well done on Kikhwa - she looks hot - you must be proud of that one
2) you alleadgedly move in myseterious ways - and so does spam
3) Oh Moses, hohoho, what will he do next eh? what party could exist to its fullest potential without him
I've got a feeling God might be around just after the 30th of August
Hmmm... omnipotent... I suppose you're right.... my brain tends to turn to mush after work and I start thinking like Homer Simpson... My bad....
Good to have you back again, God. I like you, too. :^)
Quoniam tu solus sanctus.
(Do you prefer your praises in traditional Latin? Or translated into English as you have chosen to write thy weblog?)
Correction, God likes YE OLDE English. King James version, apparently.
Latin might come in a few months. They do say that when you start getting really old, you regress back through your life and into childhood. Should be interesting to watch, ;-)
Dear God,
Your blog is definitely fun to read and I hope you will continue the mortal tradition within the weather-resistant chains of heaven.
I have a small wish to ask for. And that is that you visit my blog and bless it with never-ending popularity and success.
Thanks!
Real World Observer
I love you GOD!!!!!!!!
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