God On Halloween: I Don't Give A Rip
Glory be, My followers. Glory unto the highest.
I've had plenty of thee sound off about whether Moses should get a nice new set of commandments unto him. To be honest, the matter is still up for debate. Who knows? (besides Me) This might be a nice Christmas gift for him to enjoy. St. Peter and I both are betting he'll break them both before we even see the New Year.
Keep that under thy hat.
Speaking holidays, I've had some of My people ask about my stance on Halloween. Some people view it as a Satanic holiday and that it's un-Christian or unholy to celebrate this date. Unto thee who befit it to frown down upon those who dress in celebratory garb and walk the neighborhood with your children, I say:
Lighten up.
They're costumes, My people. Nothing less, nothing more. Their celebration of this holiday is merely to make light of the inevitable: All of you are going to die.
There is nothing wrong with a day to celebrate the dead. There, I have said it.
Does this make your God (that's Me) a heathen? Then so be it. I am SICK AND TIRED of having people speak on My behalf. Taking away a fun opportunity for children (young and old) to dress up as a pirate or a Power Ranger harms no one. It does not show an allegiance with Satan.
It irked my son to now end when some schools and places of business stopped mentioning the forbidden words 'Christmas' and 'Hannukah.' Is there some shame in celebrating occasions? Why art thou offended by these types of dates?
I give all of thee free will, but thou art tending to bland down the occasions which others were looking forward to. Keep it up and eventually every holiday will be just as bland as any other day.
As for Halloween? I don't give a rip. You're not losing points with Me by enjoying the night, dressed as a zombie or otherwise.
Besides, how else will you receive unto thee free and delicious treats?
I have spoken.
May the treats of a thousand saints find their way into the trick or treat bag of your mind.
I've had plenty of thee sound off about whether Moses should get a nice new set of commandments unto him. To be honest, the matter is still up for debate. Who knows? (besides Me) This might be a nice Christmas gift for him to enjoy. St. Peter and I both are betting he'll break them both before we even see the New Year.
Keep that under thy hat.
Speaking holidays, I've had some of My people ask about my stance on Halloween. Some people view it as a Satanic holiday and that it's un-Christian or unholy to celebrate this date. Unto thee who befit it to frown down upon those who dress in celebratory garb and walk the neighborhood with your children, I say:Lighten up.
They're costumes, My people. Nothing less, nothing more. Their celebration of this holiday is merely to make light of the inevitable: All of you are going to die.
There is nothing wrong with a day to celebrate the dead. There, I have said it.
Does this make your God (that's Me) a heathen? Then so be it. I am SICK AND TIRED of having people speak on My behalf. Taking away a fun opportunity for children (young and old) to dress up as a pirate or a Power Ranger harms no one. It does not show an allegiance with Satan.
It irked my son to now end when some schools and places of business stopped mentioning the forbidden words 'Christmas' and 'Hannukah.' Is there some shame in celebrating occasions? Why art thou offended by these types of dates?
I give all of thee free will, but thou art tending to bland down the occasions which others were looking forward to. Keep it up and eventually every holiday will be just as bland as any other day.
As for Halloween? I don't give a rip. You're not losing points with Me by enjoying the night, dressed as a zombie or otherwise.
Besides, how else will you receive unto thee free and delicious treats?
I have spoken.
May the treats of a thousand saints find their way into the trick or treat bag of your mind.
Or something like that.
God out.
posted by God at 9:25 AM
7 Comments:
Excellent. Now I can dress up and scare small children with a clear conscience.
So skeleton decorations aren't actually a sin, they are just tacky?
Freedom Girl - Go to it! Little kids love that stuff, especially when thou dresses like a mottled, reanimated corpse.
Dr. C - I'm doing all I can, My good Doctor. However, those Aussies (as I'm sure you know) can be a stubborn bunch. Bonza!
Nova - As far as I can tell (and wish to reveal) you're doing fine. Kirk Cameron, on the other hand, is going to get a serious talking-to. His self-important website is enough to give even the Heavenly Father 'growing pains.' Sorry. That was of poor taste.
Indygirl - You'd be surprised at how difficult it is to actually sin. I'm not nearly as strict and mean-spirited as the bible and the self-appointed preachers make Me out to be.
Skeletons? Tacky? I guess opinions vary, My child.
Dude, you're spamming God! Have you nooo shame?
Bwaa ha ha ha - sorry, I was trying to imagine God in a fancy dress costume. No, anyone who thinks Halloween glorifies the devil has been to the wrong Halloween parties. Some guy showed up at one dressed as a devil couple years back and we set his boots on fire with lighter fluid for extra realism. The devil's a loser - no one even dresses as him any more. My favorite was the little runaway bride in a jogging suit with a blanket over her face.
christ on a bike god - spammers really hooked onto your halloween fancy dress related post there didn't they?
they tried to be cunning as well
the spammers are trying to learn ways to foil us and lull us into thier dens of sin
give us strength to fight them
give us word verification
oh.
What are you going to do about mobbing and gangstalking and the fact that some sites say the cops and firemen are in on it, doing the harassing, etc.
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