Prayer From John S., Age 6
Here's a prayer I just got while having a sandwich:
Dear God,
I'm praying to you so that I'll get the new Yu-Gi-Oh! complete card set that I've always wanted for Xmas. I try and go to church every Sunday, pray to you every night, and don't say bad words in front of my little brother. I know there isn't a Santa Claus, but there is you, God. So please, convince my Dad to get these for me. In your name I pray. John.
Nice try, John. I just get a kick out of this. Here it is, the season when most of the world celebrates my son's birthday, and I've got this kid, who is already spoiled rotten as it is, BEGGING me to make his father buy him some Yu-Gi-Oh! cards. Does he deserve them? The evidence suggests otherwise.
In the last week, John:
- Pushed his little brother down and made him bonk his head on the wall.
- Called a girl in his 1st grade class 'crapface.'
- Threw the lunch of a handicapped child into the trash (before he had a chance to eat it)
- Kicked the neighbors cat. Hard.
John, thou hast foresaken me. Going to church and saying the occasional prayer (begging or otherwise) might not be enough this time.
Dear God,
I'm praying to you so that I'll get the new Yu-Gi-Oh! complete card set that I've always wanted for Xmas. I try and go to church every Sunday, pray to you every night, and don't say bad words in front of my little brother. I know there isn't a Santa Claus, but there is you, God. So please, convince my Dad to get these for me. In your name I pray. John.
Nice try, John. I just get a kick out of this. Here it is, the season when most of the world celebrates my son's birthday, and I've got this kid, who is already spoiled rotten as it is, BEGGING me to make his father buy him some Yu-Gi-Oh! cards. Does he deserve them? The evidence suggests otherwise.
In the last week, John:
- Pushed his little brother down and made him bonk his head on the wall.
- Called a girl in his 1st grade class 'crapface.'
- Threw the lunch of a handicapped child into the trash (before he had a chance to eat it)
- Kicked the neighbors cat. Hard.
John, thou hast foresaken me. Going to church and saying the occasional prayer (begging or otherwise) might not be enough this time.
posted by God at 1:51 PM
2 Comments:
C'mon, God. I think you're being a little hard on poor Johnny. I mean, he DID kick a cat. That's bound to get him something, right?
By the way, now that I got your attention, could you send an iPod my way? Thanks in advance.
XOXO,
PB
Oh, you guys. I got tied up playing dominos with St. Peter. (he cheats)
Firstly - Is life meaningless? Life is only meaningless is you have less meaning in it. Think about it, my child.
Secondly - Panda would like an Ipod? Hey, Panda. I'd like to learn HTML, but I've got no one to help me! (LOL!)
Thirdly - Amen. That's the equivalent of saying 'over-and-out' on a walkie talkie. I don't too bent out of shape when they don't cap those ridiculous...er, amusing prayers with an amen.
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